When you talk to a financial adviser, wealth manager, private banker, stockbroker, or other advisers, in most cases they will make you feel important, but you’ll also gain knowledge.
They understand that conversation and relationships are important.
If we take a leaf out of 19th-century philosopher, John Stuart Mill’s book. By opening ourselves up to a discussion of new ideas and opinions – even ones that we disagree with – we get a deeper understanding of topics and issues that we might otherwise take for granted.
Information shared through conversation could change our points of view, or validate our original stance. We can’t be right about everything all the time. Conversation reminds us of this.
Conversation relates to the Latin root of conversation as sermo. If we look at one of the ancient Greek words for conversation ‘diatribe’ comes up, which means the use of time, occupation, and dialogue.
It’s interesting to observe here that the other Latin word for conversation is colloquium, which implies a more intimate setting. This became the English colloquial and German umgangssprachlich that literally means “of every day.”
Communication has Latin root in communicatio as well as one in commercium or exchange between people. The ancient Greeks called this omilia, which also meant commerce, relationship, intimacy.
Our brain is an associative network. It means that our memories record not just the specific details of events, but also our feelings about them. So when it is under the influence of one emotion, it habitually makes connections to past events that triggered that same emotional response.
Emotions affect the way we feel, but they also affect the way we remember. When we relive a memory, we make a new memory in the process, with new connections.
We like twists in a story because we are wired to remember novelty, to recall events that somehow deviate from our expectations. Our brains have a biologically grounded interest in surprise. Add to the mix considerations around context, cultural differences, social circumstances, and environmental noise.
Making a connection is a very powerful proposition.
Be warned.
The downside of conversation is that it can be easy for ingenuine stories to be believed. Ernest Hemingway talked about an essential gift we all need, ‘a built-in, shockproof, shit detector’
For this reason, you have to be careful who you talk to and understand the bias that can be part of conversations. It is why we talk about the importance of independence, impartiality, and being unbiased. These are more likely to foster integrity and for you, a much safer place to have a great conversation.