“The old cliché is “the truth hurts” and not “the truth is like a warm fuzzy blanket that’s nice to snuggle” for a reason. The human brain doesn’t enjoy receiving information that threatens our self-esteem, shatters our preexisting beliefs, makes our daily lives more difficult, or threatens our status. Admitting that we’re wrong about something, or even partially at fault, isn’t easy, even when it’s for our own good. When the truth hurts, we want to protect ourselves from the pain and so we find a way to shut down, stop listening, or otherwise resist. And we’re not always aware that it’s happening.” writes Mark Murphy
Why do we hate to hear the truth, especially if it involves hearing something we need to improve? A concept called cognitive dissonance gives us an answer. The state of cognitive dissonance occurs when someone holds two psychologically inconsistent beliefs (or attitudes or opinions) that create an unpleasant mental tension.
It happens all the time. Think about Trump. It’s quite likely he’s suffering from cognitive dissonance. What about your money? If you’ve made a decision, do you want to be told its wrong? Of course not. “The truth sounds good in theory, especially if it’s truth with which we agree or that positions us in a favourable light. It’s when we hear the truth that isn’t so pleasant that we start to resist.”
If you are prepared to challenge your own thinking rather than looking for ways to support it, do you think you will improve your outcomes? The answer is unequivocal. Yes. But are you prepared to challenge your feeling?